1. |
Invisible Luv
06:27
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I used to dream
of a lover who would be proud to love me
we f*?#%! at your parents' house
and when I showed up at school the next day
and I walked up to our group of friends
you turned your body away
before I could have a chance to lift my hand to wave
and now this is proving to be
a rather depressing pattern for me
I seem to take lovers who are ashamed
Invisible love, and I'm grasping onto anything
Invisible love, that could prove this exists to me
Invisible love, and I'm crying myself to sleep
Invisible love, how could I get so deep...
Into something you insist...
does not exist...
Invisible love, and you say that it's just bad timing
Invisible love, so I'm living in hiding
Invisible love, and you won't be seen with me
Invisible love, how could I grasp on so tightly...
to something that you would swear
just is not there
oh, what did I do
to so thoroughly embarrass you?
Invisible love, we're only ever alone in your bedroom
Invisible love, and I'm running on fumes
Invisible love, and if I had the strength to
Invisible love, I would get the hell away from you...
but I guess I'll just wait around to see
if you'll ever acknowledge me
maybe you don't deserve my attention
but don't I deserve some affection?
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2. |
Crisis
06:35
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Last night I took all of my clothes out of my closet and I threw them on the floor
Everybody’s watching this TV show
It’s about a woman who helps people see what doesn’t make them happy anymore
Think I’m havin' some sort of crisis
Starting to think that’s what life is
A series of crisises (sp?)
Last night I cut all my hair off
I’ve been wanting to do that for a while
But I was afraid that you would no longer find me attractive
Then I’m looking at photos of you
And I realize that you have this haircut too
If I cant have you then I guess I’ll have to be you
Think I’m havin' some sort of crisis
Starting to think that’s what life is
A series of crisises (sp?)
I put whiskey in my coffee this morning
And later today I’m going to paint my nails black
I know that none of these things are
Necessarily changing anything but
Afterwards my mind and my body feel a little more intact
A little more intact
Still not fully intact yet
Think I’m havin' some sort of crisis
Starting to think that’s what life is
A series of crisises (sp?)
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3. |
My Nihilist Darlin'
03:53
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My nihilist darlin'...
If you don't believe in god, well I can tell you that I'm your kind of broad
and you don't have to be sad that god is dead
come on baby and believe in me instead
My nihilist darlin'
you say you don't care about a thing
but I'm determined to make you care about me
oh, it won't hurt a bit let me show you and you'll see
together we can revel in misery
oh no...
If you feel like you're just wasting time
no matter what you do 'cause we're all gonna die
why not put your little hand in mine?
might as well feel useless side by side
one more time...
My nihilist darlin'
you say you don't care about a thing
but I'm determined to make you care about me
oh, it won't hurt a bit let me show you and you'll see
together we can revel in misery
oh no...
oh no, no, no
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4. |
Memo
02:32
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5. |
Must've Been
05:25
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You must be so scared
that's why you hold on to everything so tightly
paying no mind to your hands
and who it is, or what it is
they might be suffocating
who taught you how to love?
must've been, must've been
a vise grip with human flesh
who taught you how to love?
must've been, must've been
a hammer with a human head
must've been, must've been
and you must feel so insecure
that's why you nail yourself and everyone else
down to the floor
and you must feel so threatened
that's why you break everything in half
before it can bend
who taught you how to love?
must've been, must've been
a vise grip with human flesh
who taught you how to love?
must've been, must've been
a hammer with a human head
must've been, must've been
and fear won't make them stay
and it won't bring back
any of the good things that
you've already driven away
fear won't make them stay
fear will make them run away
who taught you how to love?
must've been, must've been
a vise grip with human flesh
who taught you how to love?
must've been, must've been
a hammer with a human head
must've been, must've been
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6. |
Dynamite
05:42
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I’m still writing songs about the way that you hurt me
I am scared that everyone I love will desert me
Sometimes pain is all that I can think about
My darling’s such a dear but they’re so confused when I blow up and they’re wondering how they lit the fuse
I wanna be dynamite, but not like that
I wanna be dynamite, but not like that
I wanna be dynamite, but not like that
And if I could, would I go back?
I wonder if I could, would I go back?
Somebody told me that I wont move forward until I let go of what came before but I’m still mourning all the things you changed in me
And my darlings such a dear
But it’s just not fair when I’m freaking out and I can tell you’re scared
I wanna be unpredictable but not like that
I wanna be dynamite, but not like that
I wanna be dynamite, but not like that
I wanna be dynamite, but not like that
And if I could, would I go back?
I wonder if I could, would I go back?
It’s too late to change the past now
“If I could would I go back?”
what’s the point in asking that
When to be a person is to get hurt
And I can love the parts of me that only exist because of what you did to me I can love what feels the worst I imagine myself I imagine who I want to be
my head picked up off the floor not debilitatedly insecure
seeing what I have and not just what I lack
still writing songs, still riding out panic attacks
I can be dynamite like that
I can be dynamite like that
I can be dynamite like that
And I don't think I’m going back
And if I could, well I don't think that I’d go back
I don't think I’m going back
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